Life without good friends is like a body without soul - it loses its meaning and charm. Friends share our joys and sorrows. We can express feelings of our heart to a good friend. A good friend is our best guide in crisis. One of the greatest philosophers of the world Emerson called good friend a master piece of Nature. Children, adults, politicians, writers, journalists, clerks, labourers or businessmen all need friends to make career and enjoy life. But having a circle of valuable friends is not an easy task. Making friends or influencing people, in fact, is an art and like other arts it can be learnt. 1. HOW TO START A CONVERSATION Many persons want to talk to others but it is very difficult for them to start a conversation. They get somewhat nervous and sentences don't come up in their minds. Consequently they are unable to strike friendship with others. Such persons should keep some opening sentences in mind. After some time it becomes easy for them to start a talk and establish a bond of friendly relations. Several easy openings may be: i) What is the time please?; ii) Excuse me, do you have a pen please?; iii) Could you tell me which bus leads to....?; iv) Would you please guide me about the best eating place here? v) Is India going to win this match? etc. 2. POWER OF ADMIRATION Everybody loves praise and recognition for his talent and work. Even the kings loved to surround themselves with flatterers. Poet wrote songs admiring their kingdom and good qualities. Todays politicians also like the company of those people who can boost their ego by praising them to skies. Big figures may enjoy flattery but a common person needs genuine praise. Every human being has a unique quality and he or she wants to be appreciated for it. Unfortunately people are so busy in their own affairs that they hardly have any time to understand or admire these qualities. In case you are wise enough to spare some time and admire persons genuinely you will be rewarded with a positive response from the person whom you admire. Most of the people understand the difference between real and fake admiration. So be genuine in appreciation. 3. HAVE SOMETHING GOOD TO TELL If you want to earn the goodwill of God distribute happiness not sorrows. People in todays industrialised world are already full of sorrows and tension. They need some fun. So whenever a person approaches them with a sullen face he is generally ignored. Nobody is interested in wasting time on him. People avoid a person who always has something bad to tell. If you want to be welcomed by the people paste a label of good news on your forehead. It means you must have something good to say to people. 4. LISTEN CAREFULLY Chatterboxes - the persons who talk too much - always bore others. They only want to speak and dont want to listen to anybody. They are not liked. Good listeners are welcomed everywhere. A human being has a tendency to express and find audience for him. So if you have any desire to make friends learn to keep patience, and listen carefully. You wont have any dearth of good friends. 5. UNDERSTAND THE FEELINGS Hurt the feeling of anybody and you sow the seed of enmity. So be careful with your words and choose them carefully while talking to others. Everybody has something to say that is close to heart and he/she is hungry to find someone to whom it can be confided. If you want to make friends respect the feelings of other people. Understand them with total sincerity. Share their feeling of joy and sorrow. This habit will open for you the door of friendships. 6. BE GENUINELY INTERESTED Develop genuine interest in people. If you are just interested in selfish motives and have no regard for the desires and hobbies of others then forget you will ever be able to make friends. Talk about their favourite TV/movie star or player. Discuss about the game they like, the hobby they enjoy or the political party they favour. If a person thinks that he is valued he feels happy and enthusiastic. 7. FIND COMMON INTERESTS Birds of the same feather fly together. Common interests create a bond between two persons. Find out some common interests between you and the person whom you want to befriend. To have knowledge about common interests sometimes you have to talk to a person on various topics. You will soon have an idea regarding areas of similar tastes and a way to strike friendship. 8. HELP TO ACHIEVE GOALS Goals of a person are most dear to his heart. A person has to struggle very hard in life to achieve his goals. He always wants to surround himself with persons who can help or guide him to achieve the goals. So if you know about the aims and goals of a person and find a way to help him you can win his friendship easily. And be sure, it is mostly a very intimate and durable friendship. Moreover helping someone achieve his or her goals is a sacred task. 9. CONTROL YOUR EMOTIONS Some people are slave of their emotions. It is very difficult for them especially to control angry outbursts. We can't make good friends or maintain them for long if we are one of those slaves. Though it is not easy to have a reign over our emotions yet we can learn to control them if we take a pledge today. Regular emotional outburst erode the harmony of friendship. We cant maintain any good relationship for long if we constantly hurt each other. Only those persons have a large circle of friends who know how to control their emotions. 10. VALUE OF SMALL GIFTS The best method of excellent communication is a small gift. Whenever a person receives a gift, given to him or her with a smiling face and a warm heart, it always leaves a lasting impression. Who doesn't like to receive gifts? A gift is a sure-fire method to melt the blocks of communication. It makes a person receptive. On important occasion send a greeting card, SMS or just give call. Gift and greetings are the oldest and the sweetest cord of social relationships. |
