The holiday season is one of the most stressful times of year for many people. Its a classic example of how we ask too much of ourselves and of others.

November comes around and suddenly we expect to turn into a Martha Stewart! We want a beautifully decorated house, delectable homemade treats, perfect, well thought out personalized gifts and well-behaved, eternally grateful children......even after weve disrupted their sleep routines and filled them up with cookies and candy. A little unrealistic, perhaps?

So how do you avoid creating a horribly hectic holiday? Here are some tips:

1. Ask each family member what their number one favorite part of the holiday is and only do those. You dont have to do everything! You might be surprised that there are some things that arent as important as you thought.
2. Skip the holiday cards-send New Years cards in January or Valentine cards in February when you have more time. When you send something later, people are more likely to read it. If you send cards and family updates in January or February theres a better chance theyll remember what it said.
3. Give theme gifts: magazine subscriptions, donations in their name, gift cards, tickets to a concert, movie, play, etc. Go through a list of magazines and choose one that fits each person on your list. Think about their favorite store, go online and order a gift card for them. Give them tickets to an event you both like and maybe theyll share the second ticket-the gift that keeps on giving.
4. Take a nap after Thanksgiving Dinner and wake up when the ball drops on New Years Eve. Thought Id toss that in for fun.
5. Make a list before heading out the door. Nothing is more time consuming that wandering around the mall waiting for the perfect gift to jump out at you. Go through catalogs or magazines for ideas, decide what you want and buy only whats on your list.
6. Go shopping with a friend and combine it with a massage, spa treatment, sauna or a soak in a hot tub. How fun would it be to shop for an hour or two and have a great meal or spa date afterwards!
7. Breathebreathe.breathe. A deep breath will help you slow down to think and make better decisions. Think about the last minute craziness before guests arrive-mind racing, bouncing from one thing to another. Stop, take a deep breath and your mind and body will automatically slow down.
8. Make the holiday meal a group event: ask guests to bring part of the meal. If you are hosting an event say up front you are providing the main dish and they can choose a side dish to bring. No need for a hostess gift then. How many candles or knick knacks do you need?
9. Schedule FUN things for yourself. While you do lots for your families and friends this time of year, dont forget to do something for yourself-go to a movie, buy yourself a little gift, hang out with a friend, go skiing or try something youve always wanted to do.
10. And finally, do only the things you need to do and the things you love to do. Let go of the rest. What traditions do you love and which ones feel like chores? Going back to Tip #1,only do the number one favorites. And dont forget your favorites as well! When you do activities you truly enjoy, you will be more energized and happy. Doing activities that feel like chores is draining and can leave you with feelings of emptiness and fatigue. Thats NOT what the holidays are supposed to be like.

The holidays have special meaning for everyone, gratitude, giving and celebration. You cant honor those when youre stressed out and exhausted.

Make this Holiday Season the happiest and least hectic one yet!