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Site Home –› Family & Home –› Parenting
 

Parenting Your Teenager: What Happens When Parents Think Apart

 
Author: Jeff Herring

Where did we get the crazy idea that parents have to agree on each and every facet of parenting?

Just stop and think about it a moment. Two people from different homes and backgrounds, are now supposed to come together and agree on every involved in something as complicated and complex as parenting.

I just don't buy it.

In my experience working with families for over 25 years now, parents do not have to think alike on everything. They do, however, have to do what I call think together.

It's fairly easy to spot when parents are caught up in thinking apart.

Signs of thinking apart

  • Each parent believes that he or she has the right way to handle the children, and the spouse is just another child in the mix.

  • The parents openly disagree in front of the kids.

  • Each parent actively undermines the other.

  • One parent and a child regularly keep secrets from the other parent.

  • The teen is clearly in charge at home.

Results of thinking apart

  • A wedge is driven between the parents, creating resentment and animosity.

  • The kids know which parent to ask to get a yes to a question.

  • The kids know how to play the parents against each other.

  • The kids become more and more manipulative.

  • The kids develop a strong "I-want-what-I_want-when-I-want-it" syndrome.

Author Bio:

Jeff Herring

Jeff is a marriage and family therapist, singles and relationship coach, mentor coach, speaker, syndicated relationship columnist and author.

Jeff has a full time private practice in Tallahassee in which he specializes in couples, teen and parent counseling. He also is a relationship coach specializing in working with couples and singles. Some of his professional activities include:

==> Internationally syndicated relationship columnist through Knight-Ridder/Tribune Media Services, with a weekly readership of over 10 million worldwide

==> Sought after speaker for organizations, associations, churches, and corporations

==>Twice weekly appearances on The Steve and Sara Show on Magic 107.1

==> Author of "Keep the Changes: 52 Tools for Successful Living" a collection of his best columns, as well as several e-books including "How to Create a Passionate and Loving Relationship.........Forever," "How to Beat the BOZOs: Dealing with difficult people without becoming one," and "Tame Your Teen: THE survival guide for parenting your teenager.

==> Founder and CEO of TheArticleGuy.com

==> Founder and CEO of SecretsofGreatRelationships.com

==> Founder and CEO of ParentingYourTeeanger.com

==> Founder and CEO of ToolsforSuccessfulLiving.com

==> President of BuildingYourIdealPractice.com

==> President of ConsciousDatingTallahassee.com

You can search for this article using: single parenting, parenting advice, parenting information, teen parenting, parenting tips
 
 
 

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